2015

He has made everything appropriate in its time.

(Ecclesiastes 3:11a)

There were so many things happen in this year. The good and the bad, but I believe that everything happen for a reason. I believe that God’s plan is more beautiful than anything in this world. So that I want to thankful to God for His bless and time. Everything just happen in time, in His time. Not too early, not too late.

My mom was diagnosed cancer stadium 3 on August 2014 and she should be done 6 cycles of chemotherapy treatment. 3 cycle before surgery and 3 cycles after surgery. At first, I and my family was afraid, sad, and did not know what should we done that time. My family never got serious ill before and we still not familiar with cancer. The thing in my head was someone will dead if they were diagnosed have cancer especially at the high level. But God really worked at my family. He helped my family to go through this. He gave a great doctor to cure my mom, He helped us in financial, He gave a courage and strength to my mom that He is bigger than this ill. I am so thankful that God never leave us alone and I believe that God has beautiful plans behind it, even I still do not know, but I still believe in him. After done 3rd chemotherapy my mom got a surgery and everything was going well. Then she should do 3 more cycles of chemotherapy. But unfortunately, the scars of surgery did not become better because my mom’s skin condition. Then the doctor said to add 1 more cycle of chemotherapy and done a small surgery to close the scar. Actually, my mom already tired with all these treatments, but she still want to do it. And after a month of last chemo and small surgery, the doctor said that the scar still bad and so that he recommend to done surgery again. That was so hard for us, we think about my mom condition that has been dropped because of the chemotherapy and also about the financial. But God’s really show that He is alive and not leave us alone. So that my mom done the second surgery on May 2015 and thank God everything was going well after that, even though my mom still needs medicine to increase her immune system until now. But I’m still thankful to God that my mom’s recovery going well. Some people said to me that we should be thankful because my mom still can walk and eat well. Usually, people who have done chemotherapy should take a bed rest for a month. That’s all God’s work.

I also want to be thankful that I graduated this year. I started doing my thesis on August and at that time, my mom was diagnosed have cancer. At first, it should be hard to finish the thesis on time, but one more time God’s helped me. He made everything going well. He gave me a great lecturer for my thesis, and he gave me knowledge to finish my thesis on time. He gave friends, cousin, and relatives who always support me. At the final presentation, God’s really worked! I was only 30 minute inside and all the judges not gave me a hard question and tried to get me down, but they gave me advice to improve my thesis. When I went out the room, some friends asked, “It’s done? Whoa you are so fast! Everybody was done in one hour till two hours and you are just 30 minutes? You are so lucky!” Well, I’m not lucky, I’m blessed. Besides that, my motivation to finish my study was my parents. I presented this bachelor to my parents.

The other things that I want to be grateful is my brother. My brother is very stiff and not really care about the others, but he is a lovely and caring brother to me. My brother has his own life principle that nobody can bother. But I thankful that finally he can start to open his world, try to humble himself for his own goodness and also my parents. My brother did not finish his study because he thinks that bachelor or not was not important. My parents at first really disappointed of him, but then asked him whether he want to helped my father’s shop and he said he don’t want. Every day was like “hell” for me. My parents sometime yelled and angry to him. And I think the words was so hurt my brother. I always cried alone at my room when I heard that. I just want to say STOP! I understand why my parents angry. Every parent wants their children succeed in life, but sometimes I think that their way by yelling is wrong. That was just make everything worst. But I also know my brother should have a reason, he just needs a support to do what his like to do. An understanding to what he feels and wants. Same like me. But thanks to God that He did not give us a hatred heart. We still love our parents no matter what they do. Because I believe that God has placed us in this family with a good reason. And sometimes God is work in the way we cannot see and understand, like what He did in my brother’s life. Now my brother wants to help my father at the shop without anger from my parents, he just do it by himself because he cares to my father. Last month my father should get a surgery because of hernia. I never see my father in pain before, he is a strong man. But last month was my first time to see him in such pain. That time I feel like this year was my parents sick time and one thing matter is about financial, because we are not a rich family we just enough. And actually, God’s worked again, He make everything going well (Proverbs 30:8) and you know what, because of my father’s sickness my brother finally want to help him at the shop. I think this was God’s way for my brother. I am really thankful for that. I also grateful that my father’s recover going well and he already can start his routines again.

This year I also want to thankful to God for my job as a kindergarten teacher assistant. I think that God placed me here to make me grow more in Him. The environment at my workplace always make me remember God is alive and He is here with us. He also wants me to have a character like Him (1 Thessalonica 5:12-22 > respect your leader, life with peace with others, be calm and be joyful, always pray and grateful). I was grateful that I can work with children. I learned so many things from children. Remembered that others are our mirror to become what God want us become. God can speak through other people and I feel that God always there. I was so thankful for my partner, she is so great! I learned about discipline, consistent, and how to deal with children from her. People misunderstand that I’m quite because of my partner is too dominant or so on. But that’s not right. She is so nice and I think I understand her more day by day. The thing about I’m quiet is because I’m not a sociable person. I need time to adapt in new environment till I feel comfort. When I started my university life, it was also hard for me to feel comfort with the environment. So that’s not because of others. I was really thankful that she is my partner. God should have a reason why He make us a partner. Even though sometimes I still feel uncomfortable with others, but I still thankful to work here. And I believe God will always teach, and beside me to make me grow in him. I want to serve Him more and more even though I’m not perfect, I’m afraid and cry easily, but I want to serve him more and be blessing to others. And also, I want to thank Mr. Ivan who made me remembered that God is always with us, helped us, make us safe in His hands because He has died for us.

Finally, I just want to say thank you so much to my Father, my Teacher, my everything, our mighty God for this year. Thank you for everything you have done for me and my family. That was so amazing. Thank you for always be here, in my heart who always comfort me when I’m down and feel unneeded. You always there to pick me up. Thank you God, thank you Jesus…